Aug 2011 // Rick Cabral
One of the least endearing qualities that I find in another is pride. I have an uncanny ability to spot it in someone else a mile away. I often see it in professional athletes, politicians, pastors and even in my wife. Unfortunately, what is not so easy to detect is the pride that lives inside of me.
I’m not talking about taking pride in something that I do, as in the pursuit of excellence; rather, I’m talking about the ugly side of pride that I don’t want to recognize in myself. The irony is that the pride in my life has an interesting way of masquerading itself as something that it is not. That being an undeserving, overestimation of my accomplishments, skills, position or possessions.
I decided to take a look at some of the ways that pride lives in my daily life. For me, it appears in a variety of ways. I may size someone else up based on their appearance, what car they drive, what they do or where they live. I instantly make a snap judgement about his or her character, yet I have no idea who the individual truly is as a person. Another instance may be when I am in a discussion that has opposing viewpoints and I make it a point to get in the last word. Or perhaps it’s when I have gotten into an argument with my wife, and even though I know I’m wrong, I choose not to apologize.
So where am I, and what is my motivation when I pass judgement on others, refuse to admit when I am wrong, or feel the need to be recognized as the clever guy who has all the answers? Simply put, I am preoccupied with the trinity of me, myself and I. Essentially, I am attempting to elevate myself to a position that puts me a “cut above” everyone else. But why? Insecurities. I think insecurities are inherent in all of us, whether they come from our upbringing or have developed through our lives. I certainly have my share. If I am being honest, I would prefer to be smarter, taller, better looking and a few years younger. For someone else, it may be something different, but I believe we all have things that we we would like to change if we could. At times, I know I would.
Why did I decide to write about the topic of pride in my life? Honestly, it is because I don’t like what I see when I look in the mirror. I don’t like the undeserving judgement that I make about others, or the facade I present at times that I have things all figured out. Because the truth is, I don’t have it all figured out, I don’t have all the answers. And as much as I try to find the solution to my struggles in me, I invariably discover that the answer can never be me. But aren’t we in the best position when we surrender and accept that we don’t have all the answers? Isn’t that when pride has the chance to turn into humility, and humility then can open the door for acceptance and love?
So today, instead of looking out a mile to spot the prideful traits of others, I turn my attention to the shortest distance to better help myself. It’s no farther than the closest mirror.